Friday, December 16, 2005

Sometimes it's my turn

People are idiots, and I mean that affectionately. We all take turns in the idiot line. Sometimes it's my turn. Some people take cuts -- often. I suspect they believe they're in line for something else. Perhaps a buffet or merry-go-round.

I once stood in line to watch undergrads clean and number rat bones at the La Brea Tar Pits. Worse than that, I paid money to watch them from behind protective glass. Do you do something so interesting people would pay $8 to stand in line and watch you work then browse your gift shop? I could have stayed home and watched my grandfather break chicken bones and suck the marrow out for free. I'm confident the students behind the glass thought I was an idiot. I do. Whenever I visit my local party store Art and George ring up my Bud Lite from behind protective glass, but that's a combination tar-pit/gift-shop with a very short line. What's idiotic is paying $11 when I could have bought them at the grocery store for $7. The price of convenience.

It's our duty as friends and family, or simply as citizens of the same planet, to let people know when they're acting silly. And when we find ourselves at the front of the line we must raise our own hands and say, "That was me. I did it. I'm an idiot."

All of us have our own things-idiots-do list. Mine is pretty long. Yours probably is too. You might be adding "people who think so highly of themselves they post to blogs" to your list right now.

Everyone takes turns being an idiot. Sometimes it's my turn. Don't forget to stop by the gift shop and bookmark this page.


  1. Some of us recognize the idiotic things we do and then the other half thinks that everyone else is an idiot.

    I have know problem calling myself an idiot when it is well deserved such as driving a forklift through a snow covered parking lot knowing the probability of getting stuck is 100%. Adrian Allen

  2. This is a very amusing blog.

    As for coughing up eight bucks to watch the floor show at the La Brea Tar Pits, it might depend on what the undergrads were wearing.

  3. Somehow, "..driving a forklift through a snow covered.." isn't surprising coming from a guy who raced automobiles on ice-covered lakes.


  4. I just read this on Mark Steyn's blog:

    Of Dwight MacDonald, the unbelievable blowhard critic, Mr. Soon-to-Have-an-Ice-Pick-in-His-Head said, "Everyone has the right to be stupid, but Comrade MacDonald abuses the privilege." Now that's one quote you just have to hope isn't ersatz.